Your Breath Is the Best Meditation Teacher You'll Ever Have
In many forms of meditation, the breath is the primary focal point. The reason for this is that we are always breathing. And, if we are not, then we have bigger things to worry about than meditation 😉. But assuming that we are still breathing, it is the focal point of the meditation because it is always with us, everywhere we go. It centers us, and lets us reboot and refocus, no matter what else is going on around us.
On top of that, deep breathing has been shown to be a genuinely effective way to reduce stress. So building it into a meditation practice just makes sense. We get the stress-reduction benefits, and by consciously practicing deep breathing, it becomes easier to focus on the breath itself, because we're making a deliberate effort not just to breathe deeply, but to actively pay attention to it while we do.
Here's the payoff: continually bringing our attention back to the breath improves our ability to focus in other areas of our life too. The more we practice, the better we get. That skill of setting aside distractions while we're sitting there breathing? It follows us out into the rest of our day.
Your Mind Is Going to Wander… But That’s Okay
If you sit down and try this, you'll notice your mind wandering. A lot. You'll start thinking about what you need to do today, something that happened yesterday, booking a vacation, what's for dinner, what you're going to wear. On and on it goes.
Here's the important part to remember: this happens to everybody. It doesn't mean you're bad at meditation. It's just how our minds tend to operate, racing ahead to figure out what's next, and what's after that, and what's after that. Even people who've been at this for years still catch themselves mid-thought and have to gently steer their attention back to the breath.
The other thing to remember is that meditation isn't about NOT thinking. It's about learning to refocus your mind on one thing, instead of letting it fire off in a hundred directions at once. There will be plenty of time later to chase those thoughts down. For now, we're practicing setting them aside.
Presence Is Simpler Than It Sounds
One of the underrated benefits here is that it teaches us to be more present. When I first started and someone told me to "be present," I honestly had no idea what that meant. The best way I can put it now is this: being present just means being with whatever you're with, right now. Experiencing what's happening in this moment, not the one before it and not the one after it. That's mindfulness, in a nutshell.
Picture your kid bursting through the door, dying to tell you some big exciting news. Being present means being there with them. Listening to everything they're saying. Fully in it. Not glancing at your phone every few seconds, not mentally drafting an email to your boss while you say "uh huh, yep, mmm hmmm" in all the right spots. You're locked in on what's happening right now.
The thing to remember is, that catching yourself having random thoughts and then letting them go and bringing your attention back to your breath is meditation. Realizing "Oops, my mind has wandered off" means you are getting it. You are already improving. You are already more aware.
Ditch the "Forgive Yourself" Talk
A lot of phrases like "forgive yourself" and "don't beat yourself up about it" just because you can't stop having thoughts get tossed around the meditation world. I would like to downplay all of that to a certain extent and say instead, "don't worry about it… roll with it… and just stick with it".
The reason I say this is that "forgiving yourself" and phrases of that nature imply that you've done something wrong. The only wrong way to practice meditation is to not practice it. If you are showing up every day and giving it an honest effort, even if you are struggling, you will improve and you will benefit from it. So my advice is just relax and go with the flow. Most of all, enjoy the process!
One more thing worth remembering: once you notice you're thinking about something, you don't need to chase that thought down, and you don't need to judge it either. It doesn't matter if it was a good thought, a bad thought, a happy one or an angry one. Just notice you had it, and move on. We're not analyzing our thoughts here, and we're definitely not following them down whatever rabbit hole they're offering. We just say "bye for now" and get back to breathing.
My Own Rocky Start
For a long time, I practiced meditation but did not enjoy it. Why? Because rather than just chilling and breathing, I was constantly worried that I was doing it wrong. I wasn't having some profound spiritual breakthrough every single time, which I'd somehow convinced myself was supposed to happen. I struggled to focus, which, as it turns out, is extremely normal.
Once I let go of my preconceived notions about what this whole thing was supposed to look like, along with a bunch of unrealistic expectations and other baggage I'd been dragging along, I finally started enjoying it for what it actually was.
Sometimes I found it quite relaxing. Other times rejuvenating. Sometimes it was like hitting a reset button so that I could just chill for a bit and then carry on with my day. Many times, it would vastly improve my mindset and the quality of the thoughts I was having. Sometimes I would be inspired, sometimes moved to tears. But many times, I wouldn't feel very strongly one way or the other and there was little effect. But on those days, I could just chalk it up to "At least I practiced meditation today and took a few minutes out for me.”
These days, it's a fixture in my life, and more often than not, something I genuinely look forward to.
The Three Phases
Any meditation practice, this one included, tends to move through three phases:
Relaxation Phase — Get into a comfortable position, settle into a steady breathing pattern, and start releasing whatever stress you're carrying around.
Intention Phase — This is the main event, and it's different depending on the type of practice. With breath awareness, the intention is simple: stay focused on the breath, notice when the mind wanders, and gently bring it back. Do this enough, and your ability to concentrate on one thing at a time, without your thoughts running the show, starts to improve.
Return Phase — Bring things to a close and come back to full waking awareness of your surroundings so you can carry on with your day or evening.
A Couple of Tips
If you want to try this yourself, one technique that helps a lot is called noting. Every time you catch yourself thinking about something else, whisper or mentally say "thinking," and then bring your focus back to your breath.
Personally, I find the whispering version really effective. The act itself interrupts the thought, acknowledges it happened, and gives me a breath to take right after, which naturally redirects my focus. Give it a shot.
One of the most important tips for any type of meditation is to be good to yourself! No meditation session is ever going to be perfect, and that's totally okay. It doesn't diminish its value in any way.
And when you catch yourself thinking about something else, give yourself a pat on the back for noticing, and then gently return to the breath. And when I say return gently, I mean without judging yourself or thinking "Oh no… I did it again!"
When You’re Done
Afterward, it's worth jotting a few notes down. How'd it go? How'd you feel? Any particular challenges come up? Comparing notes across sessions over time is genuinely useful.
And remember, it doesn't matter how many stray thoughts showed up along the way. Every single time you catch yourself and bring your attention back to the breath, that's a win. You're training yourself to focus better and concentrate more effectively. Not just during meditation, but in all areas of your life.
We're not trying to stop thinking altogether. That's impossible, and honestly, thinking is a pretty useful function to have. The goal is learning when and how to concentrate on one thing at a time instead of chasing a million thoughts at once, so we can calm the mind instead of getting steamrolled by scattered, racing thoughts.
Come Join Me!
If sitting still and breathing on purpose sounds like your idea of a good time (no judgment either way), I walk through this whole Breath Awareness practice step by step, background music and all, on both the YouTube channel here or the podcast below — same episode, just pick your format. Video if you want to follow along, audio if you'd rather close your eyes and not stare at a screen while you're trying to meditate. Come hang out, breathe with me, and let's see whose mind wanders off first.
